Recently I’ve been noticing that the word “anxiety” and “anxious” have been permeating most of the conversations I’ve been participating. For some people anxiety reveals itself as a form of unconformity or discomfort when something doesn’t happen as expected. Some people feel tired or sleepy, others feel their heart beating faster, some people feel shaky, others feel hungry, thirsty, agitated, confused and some even start feeling pain, not to mention migraine, stomachache, dizziness and nausea. In other words, this is the message that our body send to us telling (or sometimes yelling) that something is not going well and needs to be changed.
Anxiety has been considered the 21st century’s disorder. But why do we feel anxious? In the holistic medicine the root of anxiety lies on the feeling of fear. And the foundation of fear, in this matter, would be basically not being in the moment. If you stop everything that you’re doing right now and just breathe – inhale counting till 4 and exhale counting till 6. Stay still and be grateful for the air you breathe; be grateful for having a place to live, that you have something to eat… How does it feel? When we are in the moment we realize that we have more things to be grateful for than to complain about; we acknowledge our power to change the situations, and realize we’re able to find solutions, be creative and more opened for new answers and insights.
I really have to say something here – I’ve been hearing people say that they feel more creative and in the moment when they smoke weed, that they can think differently (of course, you’re high!). Excuse me, if you smoke weed everyday there’s no difference between taking a prescribed drug or getting drunk. Are you trying to fix a problem getting a new one? And by prescribed drug I mean opioids and all kinds of pain killers. This way you’re not mindful, you just found another way to scape reality, numb your feelings and don’t grow. With this have been said, we can’t change the past – our choices, actions and its consequences, but we can make amends with it and let it go.
One thing we can absolutely do, and it’s in our hands, is called the present moment. It doesn’t matter what kind of problem you’re facing right now, you can always change your outcomes. Imagine if a friend of yours call you telling the same story you’ve been complaining about; what would you say to your friend? What would be your advise for him or her? You can also start with a “to do” list of things that are doable. It doesn’t really matter how you’re gonna start, as long you start breaking your mental patterns right now and take action.
And if you realize you can’t do it alone, it’s perfectly ok to ask for help. I would start talking with a friend, or even looking for a group (I love the codependents anonymous); you can also go to a church, buy some books, call a therapist or a life coach. It doesn’t matter where or how; start right now!
The reality that sometimes hurts us and is heavy to carry on is actually the path to bring awareness and build a strong bridge to happiness and success. Nobody grows without taking responsibility over their own choices. So stop blaming on others (God and parents included); stop complaining, stop bothering; grab a pen and a piece of paper and write down the answer for the following questions:
What can you do today to start changing your life? (Write as many answers you can; don’t think too much, it can be anything)
Whenever you finish that list go to the next question:
What is gonna be the next step?
You can come up with 10 different answers, choose one that is doable today, then follow through. Make another list tomorrow. I’m sure you can do it. You’re accountable for your own life. You are your own best friend; treat yourself with love and respect and start changing your life now. At the end of the day you’ll be truly grateful for dominating your anxieties and fighting your own fears, and then you’ll be able to help the people around you effortlessly. Just give it a try.